Having just received my first ever semi-ironic Christmas circular, a brilliant and original thought occurred to me. I should write a Christmas circular!
The document in question originated from the general Dalston area and was penned by this man, who apparently specialises in stereotypical fiction. (The BEST kind of fiction.)

To be honest, it’s not going to [...]

Paris doesn’t disappoint. This is a rare thing to say about a tourist attraction. In fact, I can’t think of a single other tourist attraction that does exactly what it says on the tin. It’s beautiful, it’s got brilliant food, the wine is insanely cheap, the service is that adorable French antagonistic-yet-playful-yet- consummately professional style [...]

It’s one year to the day since we arrived. And everyone I have spoken to has said it feels like SO MUCH LONGER. Because it does. This is because the universe, Gordon Brown and Ben Bernanke have conspired to force me to live through at least three separate lifetimes in the last twelve months.

So let’s [...]

I’ve worked out the secret to Christmas.
It’s order everything from M&S, make sure you have access to a 20% discount, then apply heat where relevant!
If you’re particularly fancy (or a gay) then you can combine this with some of Nigella’s easier Christmas recipes. I am talking EASY.
Check this one out:

Buy some dried fruit (that preferably [...]