What a hardcore couple of days. One of the very few benefits of being canned just before Christmas is that you can devote days to preparing a meal of absolute awesomeness. So that is what I did.
I’m not entirely sure why Paula is gesticulating like Stalin in the above photo. If memory serves it was actually more of a helicopter motion than stern finger pointing. Either way, Megan is clearly not all that impressed. Alex seems okay with it.
Anyway, the day and evening were super awesome with super awesome company. I’d go into it in more detail but I really want to tell you what we ate, instead. (It DID take me fucking days to complete so, you know, go with it.)
- Homemade chili jam with the cheese and pate course. This stuff is legendary. The whole jar went. Good thing we made seven.
- Maple roast turkey that had been soaking in brine outside for days. See this video for a more glamorous/fictional account of how it’s done. It starts at the one minute mark but -to be honest- if you’re reading this then you clearly have enough time to watch the whole thing. This blog isn’t exactly breaking news, is it?
- Mother’s homemade bread sauce with the added improvement of using a food processor to crumble the bread, rather than standing around like OCD orphans ripping it into little pieces. This was the first experience of bread sauce for a couple of the guests and it was referred to as “the shizz”.
- Maple roast parsnip and butternut squash. Homemade cranberry sauce. Stuffing and gravy a la M&S. See previous post.
- Bacon wrapped chipolatas. This appears to be a very English thing so I thought I’d try it last year. I have since found out my paternal grandmother used to make it at Christmas time so I’ve got a nice family connection to it. This is good because they are AWESOME.
- Fancy pants honey/mustard ham served cold because I had the presence of mind to cook it on Christmas Eve. There’s only one oven, after all.
Here’s a photo slideshow of the day in question. Most of the images are of food prep taken with a phone because I was/am immensely proud of the whole spread. It is exactly as interesting as it sounds.
Though, it might be worth it just to see what a raw turkey looks like soaking outside in the rain, weighed down with a spade wrapped in a plastic bag. (Told you the video was more glamorous.)
That’s the lot, kids. Happy New Year, all!